PART IV- The Great Cultural Unknown
Recap-
The previous parts described the nitty-gritty of managing one’s finances in an economy as fast-paced as America’s. We also mentioned health insurance and saving up on taxes. Yeah, we know we have all your interest now (pun intended)!
When we were kids, festivals were a different vacation. It doesn’t matter which religion you belong to; in India, even now, all festivals bring with them the vibrance that engulfs people, cutting across all differences. But this might change if you move to America, which is a predominantly Christian country, and especially if you are not a Christian. Nevertheless, because the number of immigrants has increased in America for the past few years, the meaning of celebrations and festivals has also changed in the Land of Opportunities.
It is not just the festivals and celebrations that change but also the overall social life of an Indian immigrant in America. Because of a huge Indian diaspora now residing in America, things are easier than before. However, just when you land and even after some time, you might find it hard to navigate through the cultural and social part, especially if you are an introvert, an ambivert, or someone who generally just doesn’t like people (we relate with all of these, too!).
Bimal, who has been in America for eight years now, speaks about his experiences with all these things and life as an Indian immigrant in general.
Easy-Peasy Socially Sleazy
Bimal agrees that having a social life is easy in your native country. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t good in America. However, when he talks about his experiences, things might seem different. Bimal says life is quite fast-paced in America in certain ways. You might not have time to mingle with many people all the time. But that doesn’t mean social life is all that difficult.
Our desi American friend reveals that buying a house helps you integrate more into American culture. He explains that buying a house in America is part of the American dream. So when you buy a house, people are more receptive of you than when you live on rent.
While talking about culture, Bimal mentions that Americans also celebrate various festivals. So, if you are into festivities, you could participate in all of these. The government sets up a special space where you can celebrate, light fireworks, etc. In fact, our sources (which, of course, means Bimal) inform us that there is a very happening Indian community across the US. Bimal says no matter where you go, they are always there. However, he points out that the vibrance of the community varies from city to city. In fact, a lot of these Indian communities get together and celebrate Holi since it is like a big festival in the US.
But becoming a part of this community will also depend on how outgoing YOU are as a person. For e.g., in New York, it’s very easy to socialize. You see, if you’re in New York and you step out on the road, people will talk to you. It’s that easy. However, according to Bimal, that is different in Atlanta. Nevertheless, America is a decently social civilization. So, a social life, or the lack thereof, is one less thing you need to worry about.
Along with your own culture, you can also get the chance to know and understand other cultures and religions since they all coexist in America. Bimal says that although he doesn’t believe in God, he has visited a Church and attended Thanksgiving dinners to learn more about them. He likes to participate in these activities because he loves learning about new cultures but is unsure if he also understands them.
Bimal recalls how youngsters and people, in general, might have to put certain restrictions on themselves in front of elders in India. Some people bow down, touch the feet of their elders, or have other similar marks of respect. However, such things don’t exist in America.
So, Bimal says that as an immigrant, you must try to strike a balance between all this. Our NRI friend strikes this balance by participating in these various festivals, and he says others do too. So, while there might be major cultural differences if you live in America, they might not be difficult if and when you celebrate with them.
Culturally Different but Adaptable
Expanding on the topic of cultural differences, our immigrant friend talks about the daily life and work culture that he has observed. One of the major things that shook him the most was the Gun culture.
If you have been living under a rock all these years, then this might be news to you as well – owning a gun is a very common thing in America! Part of the reason for this is that getting a licensed gun is easier in America than in India. That is why many people carry a gun in their car’s glove box. It shocked Bimal, but then he was able to wrap his head around it somehow.
The next big difference that Bimal revealed was related to people’s daily routines in America. It is visibly different from India. You already know that it is very common in India to show up at work at 10 AM, as all offices commonly start at that time. But you could get fired in America if you show up that late. In fact, 10 AM is almost half-day for many people there.
The workday in America generally starts early in the morning, at around 6:30/7 AM. Bimal himself goes to work at 6:30 in the morning. This might sound bizarre to us Indians, but that is the norm in America. So be prepared to adapt to such small yet significant changes when you land in America.
He then talks about Americans’ meal routine. People in the States usually have dinner at 6 in the evening. Yeah, at the time when we Indians are having snacks or “Chai,” people half way across the globe are having their last meal of the day and getting ready for bed. Bimal saw the cultural difference in terms of how Americans’ day begins and ends.
What surprised Bimal the most was that Americans like to make the most of sunlight. So, the moment the sun’s up, their day starts, and once the sun goes down, they are done with their dinner, and that’s the end of the day. A lot of people here have their dinner while the sun is still out, which would never be possible in India.
Next, in the list of ‘differences between India and America,’ Bimal mentions the merit system for promotion at work rather than the seniority system. He revealed that, in America, if you are good at your job, you are all set to earn well and be at a good post in America. He had discussed the same in PART II of this interview, so go check it out if you haven’t yet!
Now, if you are moving to America as a student, there are certain states you don’t want to go to because there are no good colleges, and Alabama is one of those. In fact, apart from not having a lot of good colleges, Alabama is also a very conservative and very orthodox state.
While most of the U.S. is welcoming and receptive towards immigrants and outsiders, certain states are more welcoming than others. Expanding further on the topic, Bimal advised that depending on the kind of person you are, you should choose the state you feel comfortable in. But he mentioned that southern states, especially Georgia, North Carolina, and even the eastern states, are accommodating and friendly. There is even a term for this friendly atmosphere of the Southern states called ‘Southern hospitality’, so you might want to keep that in mind as well!
Bimal also discussed one of the darker aspects of living in America, particularly in rural America (yeah, they have urban and rural areas there as well! But they are very different than they are in India and are a whole other topic of discussion so we won’t be getting much into it right now.). The topic he mentioned was ‘racism.’ He says there isn’t “a lot of racism.” But he has “been on the receiving end (of it) a couple of times.” And while he wasn’t much affected by it, you should consider this factor depending on “how much it bothers you.”
When talking about his experience with racism in America, Bimal said that “there’s always going to be a factor (in the mind of Americans) that the Indian guy comes in, goes into a tech job, (and) takes our job away.” To clarify the subject, Bimal compares this American mentality with our immigration problem in India and our neighboring countries.
So, when you get to the States, you can expect a little bit of hardship. But Bimal said “99 per cent of” his “experience has been positive”. As Bimal revealed, an example of this experience is when you, or anyone in general, are out for a walk, people say hi to you, which doesn’t normally happen in India.
While this particular topic might be a bit scary for you (we understand because it was a bit worrisome for us as well, as our fellow NRI told us he had some experience with it), think of this problem as just one more issue you will have to understand and learn to deal with. Don’t be nervous. Just be cautious.
Let’s Talk Business
While the American culture and society are all great topics for discussion, wouldn’t it make more sense to talk about the immigration process first, since that is what will actually land you in America? Now, this process is a bit lengthy and tiresome, so you need to look into it a bit more carefully.
The first thing you need to worry about with regard to the immigration process is your finances. You have to get them straight for the immigration process because that’s the first thing the authorities will see when you go for a visa interview. This is to check whether or not you can survive there without a job. So, be it your parents’ money, your savings or whatever else you have, you must show it clearly.
“You need to get your finances sorted out, first and foremost.”
You need to get your health and vaccinations sorted out before moving because this is also one of the basic requirements in the US. If you’re going as an immigrant, the American authorities expect you to have all the vaccinations, especially the critical ones. Your college will give you a sheet or checklist of vaccinations and other medical things required whenever you get there. You have to get all of those things. In fact, Bimal’s ‘HEALTH ADVISORY’ is to “get to the US as healthy as you can!”
He gave the above advice because Bimal says that you, our dear soon-to-be immigrant, should not expect medical care immediately when you land there. So, if you have any health issues, get them sorted in India. This includes getting your teeth cleaned as well. In fact, you should get every small thing you can think of before going to the States done in India only as soon as possible. This is because you might not have any time left to invest on your body once you land in America. Everything will basically be a rapid-fire round, from getting a job and doing the best possible work in college to getting through every single day.
Bimal recalls his own experience, saying that in 2017, he “was in college” and had 40-hour-long internships.” But he barely remembers that year well as he was “so busy working 17 hours a day”, which included his internship as well as attending college, doing homework, and more.
In fact, sometimes, he just managed to buy groceries, which would be a big task during the week. He was occupied 17 hours a day. So when you are that busy, there is barely any time to sleep. This is why Bimal continuously stresses the fact that you should sort out as many things as you can in India.
“Take some supplies from India with you but not too much that it overburdens you. Be picky about items!”
Next, Bimal gives some advice regarding the loan process, specifically the process of taking a loan in India. He says if one can get a loan without collateral, they should take it up. Bimal mentions that the interest for such loans is higher by a small amount, but a loan without collateral, according to him, is better. Putting a collateral for the loan starts an appraisal process with the bank, which is a very dangerous process. Giving his own example, our NRI expert, Bimal, mentions that this process alone cost his father one lakh rupees. He says that because he had a good job, he was able to pay off his loan pretty quickly.
To give you a little perspective on how quickly Bimal paid off his loan, he took a loan in early 2017. That amount had accumulated a total interest of 2.5 lakhs until April 2019, when Bimal paid off the entire amount! All this was possible because he had a good job and could earn a decent amount.
An important thing to note here is that Bimal had to pay 1,00,000 rupees just to process the loan. This essentially meant that he paid one lakh when he hadn’t taken even a dime from the bank! Now, putting that one lakh into the context of how much interest it garners, a one—or two-percent interest rate would mean the amount varying anywhere from 250,000 rupees to 300,000 rupees. So he paid 1,00,000 rupees and lost 50,000.
Another thing Bimal mentioned about the loan process in India is that banks will try to convince you to buy insurance just in case you die while doing a course. He says this is “apparently their selling pitch for the loan”.
The banks try to persuade you to buy this insurance, which costs around 50,000 – 60,000 rupees. They say that if you buy this insurance and if you die while doing the course in the States, this insurance will pay off your loan, and your parents don’t have to take the burden. And while this may sound like a tempting offer, are you planning to die after you immigrate? No. So don’t fall for such things!
“Don’t be fancy! Save money on flights!!”
Bimal recalls how back in the day, Turkish Airlines tickets costed just $500, which was 40,000 rupees, for a one-way ticket to the U.S. Now Bimal’s friend booked a 75,000 rupees ticket because he wanted to go on a European-based airline. His friend spent an extra 35,000 rupees, which he could have invested in something better. He could have gotten a great quality mattress with that extra 35,000 rupees, which would have given him a good night’s sleep for 18 months!
The point here is that this is just for a journey that you won’t even remember because all the time on the flight, you’re stressed and thinking about when you’ll land and what you’ll do. So, spending extra money on that journey is useless as it will not benefit you in any way. Bimal advises to “make a plan (about) where you want to save the money. It needs to be very planned”.
There are also some other things that you need to consider. One of these, Bimal mentions, is about the drive from the airport to where you will live in America. In fact, you need to think about it as soon as you get off your flight.
As we mentioned earlier, Bimal lives in Atlanta, and he revealed that the airport is 40 kilometres, about 20 to 27 miles away from where he lives. In fact, it is almost the same distance from any decent place where you could live in Atlanta. Now, an XL cab RIDE from there would be better because you have just arrived in America and have huge luggage. Even in this situation, you can spend $100 on a cab or take a train. It’s all a choice, so go for it if you have the money.
Bimal suggests that one should save money in the initial days. He advises you to try to be as conservative in the first few months when you are still looking for a part-time job or internship. This is because you don’t know how long it will take to get a job or anything, which will basically pay you some extra money. So be prepared for that for the first two months, and once you get a decent internship and everything, you can relax a little (but JUST A LITTLE. Not too much!!). However, your expenses must be extremely conservative for the first two months. You should not be stingy about certain things, like a mattress. But be conservative everywhere else that you can be.
Live a Little?
As we are coming to the end of the series, Bimal has one last piece of advice – ‘Live a Little.’ He says that in all the hustle of making and saving money and graduating, you must also remember to enjoy your college life a little. Now, nobody says that enjoyment and fun mean spending truckloads of money. You must not forget that you are in a new country, with so much to explore. You can live the way you had imagined. It might not happen immediately, but you will get there later. But that doesn’t mean you have to live a boring life now.
Bimal recalls that he celebrated New Year’s just a day after landing, and the celebration cost just under $100. Then, he was on his way to finding a job the next week. So, you can strike a balance and make sure that you don’t become another capitalistic machine that America has been producing for years, but you also don’t end up like a fool’s gold who is there just to party.
We (including Bimal) know that you are in America, and the only thing on your mind is to ensure that you study, earn and pay off your loan as soon as possible. But that doesn’t mean you cannot breathe between the hustle and bustle. Bimal still believes the best thing that happened to him when he just landed in America was his friends kidnapping him (not literally, because that is a felony, regardless of the country) and taking him to Nashville for a New Year’s celebration. So save money, but don’t compromise on things which don’t require such adjustments.
Since Bimal is now quite literally an expert at the dos and don’ts of being an NRI, he again shares an example of what he can now safely say he shouldn’t have done. Bimal recalls buying a $60 mattress to save every dollar possible. But this saving didn’t necessarily help him. In fact, the low quality of the mattress caused more physical ailments, which he could have avoided with a $100 mattress.
So you need to ensure that the places where you are saving money are not harming you in other ways. To date, Bimal regrets purchasing the low-quality mattress. And this is just one small example. There might be other important things on which we, as middle-class Indians in America, try to save as much money as possible. But they might cost us more in the long run.
You need to understand which items require saving and which don’t. For instance, you can save on purchasing non-caged eggs for four dollars or buy a caged egg (normal) from Krogers for two dollars. So, you need to strike a balance. The balance might come later than sooner, but that doesn’t mean you are not allowed to try at least to strive to strike that balance right now.
All this might seem like a hustle you didn’t want, but this is the journey you sign up for when you decide to move to America. It is a long journey, but that doesn’t mean it has to be nerve-wracking. You will find your way around America, including its work, life, and people. Trust the process and yourself.
Remember, every individual is different; their journey is different, and so is their success. So do take inspiration from Bimal’s journey, follow what you can and want to, but don’t hesitate to make your own path, follow your intuition, find your way out, and make your own mistakes because all of it is part of YOUR journey of immigration from India to America.
While this might all seem like a goodbye, trust us, it’s not. We aren’t done yet. Or are you? DON’T YOU DARE SAY YES!! We have more in store for you to ease your journey.
Until then, go learn how to cook. There are no house-helpers in America. It is an independent society, remember?
